Should Church's No $ex Before Marriage Law Be Abolished?


Marriage photos

A friend of mine came to me recently to advise him on something. He said a friend of his got a girl in his church he intends getting married to pregnant. According to him, the church has this strict no $ex before marriage law that whenever anyone engages in $ex before marriage and the pastor of the church gets to find out, he humiliate them by getting them to seat on a seat of shame specially designed for that situation, while he uses them to preach a sermon for that day. After which they would be suspended for a month. At the end of the suspension, the pastor will then join them together as husband and wife in a blessed marriage on which the guy would wear a milk colour suit, and the lady a milk colour wedding gown, that signifies impurity.

From what my friend told me, his friend that came to ask him for advice is a popular home cell leader in the church, that has a home cell unit in his house, and the girl he impregnated attends the home cell. The pastor has not found out yet, as the girl is just a month pregnant. His fear is how to face the pastor and tell him about the situation, knowing the consequence of himself and his girlfriend, seating on the seat of shame and enduring the sermon about their sin.

My advice was, he should tell his friend to go to the pastor with his girlfriend and tell him his intention of getting married to her, and also reveal to the pastor that she is pregnant and they won't face the shame of him humiliating them by getting them to seat on the seat of shame and endure him preaching with their sin, and their wearing a colour on their wedding day that signifies impurity, according to the church laws.

If he doesn't agree, they should leave the church and resume membership of another church that doesn't have such law. There they would get married as they intend to, and start their family. Christianity has passed the time where we have to put people through such humiliation in the excuse of fulfilling the commandment of the Bible.

Christianity was brought to Africa by Europeans. There is no European church in existence that puts it's members through such humiliation, why should the practice of Christianity in Africa be different. It's high time we start looking into many church laws in Nigeria and abolishing them. Apostle Paul in the Bible know that not everyone can keep themselves to remain virgins before marriage, why we have this scripture;

1 Corinthians 7:36-37 "But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.
Nevertheless he that standeth stedfast in his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will, and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin, doeth well."

If you were to advice this guy and his girlfriend on what to do in this situation, what would you tell them?

Also, what's your take on the church law of no sex before marriage? Feel free to express yourself by using the comment section below. Note, no use of foul language. Your comment would be deleted if any use of foul language is found. Thank you for your cooperation.